Sharing custody of a child is a reality for millions of American families, but that doesn’t mean a co-parenting dynamic is always easy. Experts say there are ways to have an effective and healthy co-parenting relationship, including by setting a predetermined schedule.
That’s what’s been working for model Gigi Hadid, who opened up to Vogue about co-parenting with her ex-boyfriend Zayn Malik. The two share daughter Khai, born in September 2020.
“Zayn and I do our custody schedules months in advance,” she told the publication. “That doesn’t mean that it doesn’t change here and there, but we help each other out and have each other’s backs.”
And despite what some news reports may allude to, Hadid said she and Malik have a “love, and a feeling of camaraderie,” as they co-parent.
Of course, being in the public eye, people may feel like they know more than they do, something Hadid acknowledged but isn’t focused on. “What we are interested in is raising our daughter together, with so much respect for each other, and not just as co-parents, but what we’ve been through together,” she shared.
A healthy relationship with a co-parent can be good for a parent’s own mental health, while also being beneficial for their child. Research shows it can help kids feel more secure, be more emotionally and mentally stable, and better at problem-solving.
If you don’t have a positive relationship with your child’s other parent, that doesn’t mean you can’t be a great co-parent. It just may take a little more work and self-care.
Gigi Hadid on Mom Life
Hadid also shared a glimpse into motherhood from her home in Pennsylvania, where she moved to get away from the constant cameras following her around in New York. Khai has a jungle-themed play space under a staircase and tubs with toys in the bathroom for “shower parties.” How cute is that? Khai also has an outdoor playhouse and climbing gym.
Motherhood has helped Hadid set boundaries, especially when it comes to her career. “I have no regrets, ever, being like, ‘I can’t make that job. I have Khai that week.’ That’s just the boundary I’ve set,” she said.
She also got real about letting go of the idea of perfectionism, which many parents understandably can struggle with. But raising kids is a journey with many ups and downs and unpredictable moments. So having that type of attitude can make all the difference.
“You wake up and do your best and you realize it is enough, and there’s a beauty in not necessarily knowing exactly how that’s going to go,” Hadid said. “I think that’s a huge lesson that I needed. And probably one of the reasons that Khai came to me.”
She continued, “You can’t always be in control. You can’t always plan. You can look at an experience as the right or wrong time for anything, if that’s your perspective. Now I just give myself the grace and look at how many things I’ve handled. Step by step, I learned. I got through it.”
